Posing Lecture No. 3

The following post is brought to you by, The Starlets' School of Posing. This is a transcript of Professor Mary Lara "Billy" Menounos Hart-Spencer's most recent lecture.

"Ladies. I'm back. Welcome me. This is a short lesson because I have an appointment for serious medical matter - varicose veins. Ay.

All right. What have we here? I will show you some pictures of the most primal, most savage, most raw posing and styling you have seen. You can learn much, ladies, if you open your mind to the wonders of the jungle! LOOK!





Yes! This Taylor Momsen, look at her. See the tilt of her head. The little mmph on her lips. Tell me, class, what strikes you about Miss Momsen? Yes, you there, go ahead.

YOU FOOL! I will not have fools in my class saying Taylor Momsen looks like the hookers in streets at night! Blasphemy! the answer I am looking for is that Taylor is an animal. She is a sensuous, intelligent panda. Yes! A panda! And that little pout? It is the method acting saying, I am panda, I want to go back to my home with the bamboo and my panda brothers and sisters.

This girl! She makes me weep because she is a genius.

Now we go to the hot, dark deep of the jungle. Where the hunters try but can never capture the creature called, THE LEOPARD! LOOK!





Again I want to weep! Ladies, look closely, what do you see? Yes, you wearing the headband, go on.

NOOOO! How dare you answer that Ms. Paz de la Huerta looks like a cat on a crazy train. Can you not see this elegant yet dangerous predator? The lipstick the color of dried blood? The sheen of perspiration from hunting her prey? No?

This class depresses me! Get away from my sight, all of you! Leave now."

End of lecture.