Who Are You Wearing (Text Me)?

Yesterday afternoon, I parked my buttocks at a spot where I could use my laptop and have full view of the TV. E! was doing red carpet coverage for the 2011 SAG Awards and aside from tweets from designers' PR people, it really was the quickest way to find out who was wearing what while actually seeing the person wearing it. So there I was searching on the internet, looking for images all the while typing a short article about whose gown looked lovely and which look was gorgeous and deciding which actress gets the adjective stunning. I mean I'll only use stunning once in the article, right?

Aay. I'm never finishing this story. Okay, okay, so there I was, with no other option but to listen to Giuliana Rancid. I mean Rancic. Well! There goes New Year's resolution number five: no more making fun of people and their names.


(What? I was in a hurry. This is the best I could draw at the moment. Leave me alone.)

OMG. The Fug Girls were spot on. It was hard to watch. I was torn between hitting mute or blindfolding myself. All right, maybe it wasn't that bad and obviously I know nothing about interviewing people, just ask the museum curator I chatted with for an article years ago. Oh, what? He doesn't remember? He remembers only silence? Yeah. He doesn't remember.

The interviews were just uncomfortable to watch. Does she want to be their friend or does she want to do an interview? When she told more than one actor to text her? Squirm. Or when she started off with, I love twitter to James Franco? Ummmm... And when she lay prone at Christian Bale's feet going, Master, what dost thou desire?

Okay. That didn't happen. But this happened:

G: How did you get here so fast?
Jesse Eisenberg: On a plane.

OH SSSSNAP!